Yesterday

The Beatles song, Yesterday comes to mind. It's fun to sing along in the car when it comes on an oldies station. "Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away, now it looks as though they're here to stay. Oh, I believe in yesterday...."

Yesterday I walked for four hours along a tree-lined mountain road. Yes, I said FOUR HOURS and my feet hurt as proof. When I came home, I got a phone call from a boiler room offering me a vacation for World Mark. I've always loved World Mark vacation time shares and have wanted to sign up. I always have big dreams that are elusive. Sometimes it feels so close and then it all fades away. I should have told the World Mark guy the blunt truth. No, We don't qualify. We live on a fixed income because my husband is disabled. I can't afford to come to the presentation. I can't afford the gas money. I can't even afford to go to the store for groceries. Pretty pathetic.

I can't afford to volunteer because I don't have the gas money to go anywhere and I don't think you should volunteer when you need to work hard to bring in money. I don't seem to be getting anywhere. My dreams keep going up in smoke. I always dream big and have big ideas. My imagination runs wild with what I would like to do and where I want to travel.

I don't have any health insurance. I had cancer in 1993 and I haven't been checked in years. I've had stroke symptoms and sometimes my chest hurts. I'm morbidly obese. So how do I deal with this? I try to exercise, eat healthy, and do what I can each day that is possible and positive for me. That's all I can do.

I try hard to do what I can do within the limits of my life, like walking the four hours yesterday. I've read eight books this month so far. I'm working on the 2/3 of my juvenile novel and getting the chapters finished for my cruise mystery novel. I sent in a restaurant review about McGrath's Fish House on July 23rd for my direct mail marketing class with American Artists and Writers and I'm waiting to hear back. I'm waiting to hear back from Writer's Digest Magazine about an article I submitted. I work on my garden and I have corn almost ready. I have a lot to be grateful for but dreams are elusive. All my Big Ideas seem to be going nowhere. Maybe it's okay. I still have food in the cupboard. I have the opportunity to write, read, exercise, and garden. No, not everything is the way I want it but I guess I should be grateful for what I have and can do. A lot of people are having problems right now. I'm not any different from any of them. Why should I get the gold ring I'm always reaching for? Friends are missing from my life. I'm living a centered life supposedly, and maybe if I keep working hard eventually something good will happen. Maybe someday............................

Barack Obama as President is my hope for my dreams and a better life.